I do not like “politically correct” rhetoric – because so often being political is not being correct. Why pander to a militant minority when it is the (often silent and long suffering) majority who have a fair idea of what is right/required.

Thus, when I read the following actual accounts of US police officers talking to their “clients” I had to share it. Well done officers. If only the whole world communicated with this truth and clarity. Without fear of reprisal.

1. “You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right. We don’t. Sign here.”

2. “I’m glad to hear that the chief of police is a personal friend of yours. So, you know someone who can post your bail.”

3. “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.”

4. “The answer to the last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

5. “Warning? You want me to give you a warning? OK I’m warning you not to do that again or I’ll give you another ticket.”

6. “If you run you’ll only go to jail tired.”

7. “Can you run faster than 1200feet per second? Because that’s the speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.”

8. “If you take your hands off the car I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”

9. “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch after you wear them a while.”

10. “You don’t k ow how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to pm the ticket.”

11. “No sir,we don’t have quotas any more. We used to but now we’re allowed to write as many tickets as we can.”

I salute you!